Jersey Shore in Fifteen Words or Less

The following, from BWE.tv’s Jersey Shore recap, is just about the most perfect summation of a reality show two-hour premiere that journalism has ever produced: “Angelina also made a huge deal about how some random chicks took off their thongs in the hot tub and now the water is unsanitary. Last time I checked, thongs aren’t some air-tight bio-shield. Go cheat on your boyfriend again with that guy who I’m pretty sure was Lennie from ‘Of Mice and Men’ in an Ed Hardy t-shirt. Pauly D was right to call you out for having garbage bags for suitcases. Have some class, lady.”